My 4th grade daughter has been running for student council since the 2nd grade. This year was her 3rd year losing the election (she’s never won). She’s meticulous. She wants her posters perfect, stickers perfect, speech funny…and perfect. As a parent we always want our kids to win, we tend to be more competitive in their lives than in our own, so taking a loss with our kid is double discouraging.
She get’s in the car and I’m anxiously waiting for her to tell me the results of the election and she quietly says “I lost”. I immediately begin consoling her, searching for all the right words to say and even resorting to ice cream of all things to cheer her up when she interrupts me and says with a sincere smile, “There is always next year, right?” immediately followed by, “I should have practiced my speech more.”
WOW, what a powerful lesson! She wasn’t defeated, she was empowered knowing that she has more to give. She didn’t feel like a failure. She didn’t accept defeat. She didn’t for one second think she should quit trying. She didn’t make it about anyone else but her own efforts. She immediately assumed that if she worked harder, she’d have a better chance at winning.
Does it guarantee her a win? No. But it does guarantee that she’ll have peace of mind knowing that she gave her all.
Guarantees on the other hand are for failures. Another term for failure is that of the infamous “Self Fulfilling Prophecy”. This is what happens when you assume the worst in any circumstance or situation. You assume you will fail and therefore your mindset reflects that of a failure, you guaranteed it.
You assume you will do poorly on a test therefore you don’t study. You assume someone doesn’t like you, therefore you avoid them. You assume cleaning up your diet won’t change your health so, why try? You assume you can’t reach your goals so you don’t set them.
Conversely what would happen if we developed a plan and assumed the best? What if you assumed that if you spent more time studying you’d get your A on your test? Or if you kindly reached out first to someone you perceive as unfriendly, they would be friendly as well. Maybe you give yourself a solid 30 days of making better choices in your diet?
The bad news is you’re still not guaranteed your A (remember guarantees are for failures). That person may never become your friend, and you may not see the physical changes you’d hoped to see. What you will have is confidence and peace of mind knowing that you honestly tried. You won’t have to live with the disappointment of the proverbial “what if”. You’ll learn that maybe you need to work harder on a subject than your peers, maybe instead of investing in new relationships – put your efforts into deepening the relationships you currently have, maybe you can use guidance or more direction with your diet?
No matter how you choose to perceive missing your mark, if you’re going to miss, miss while putting your best foot forward.
We can’t help with all things, just all things fitness and nutrition. If you’re tired of missing the mark on your own, reach out to us at Emersion CrossFit. We’ll guarantee you’ll put your best foot forward.